There comes a time when you can tell that something has clicked in someone's head. The lightbulb is there. The facial recognition is there. It is an amazing thing to see.
This happened this morning. Michael woke up in an particularly agitated mood. He just couldn't seem to remember house rules and as such, was "reminded" gently. However, his reaction wasn't so gentle and he found himself on the losing side of an argument with Big Daddy. (Which of course he blamed me for as he screamed at me from his room after calling me a "loser" and told me that it didn't matter because later in the week he was going with Little Dad. Hmmph.) Ultimately, when he finally calmed down he felt the need to tell me that I was being a bit harsh.
Here is my philosophy. He lives in my house, by my rules. It is not a discussion. I explained this to him. I asked him how many times he had heard me remind him about the rules in the past. He wanted to come out of his room and I told him that I wasn't ready yet. He sat in his doorway and said that he understood why he was in trouble and was able to articulate every misstep and faulty choice. It is the first time that he has been able to do that. He then stated that the problem is that he needs to practice making better decisions in dealing with his anger and frustration. We discussed what some of those options were.
Result? Punishment stands. I got a hug and he told me he loved me. I tackled him. Hugged him, told him that I loved him and made him a promise that I would relive this with him when he had his kids.
This happened this morning. Michael woke up in an particularly agitated mood. He just couldn't seem to remember house rules and as such, was "reminded" gently. However, his reaction wasn't so gentle and he found himself on the losing side of an argument with Big Daddy. (Which of course he blamed me for as he screamed at me from his room after calling me a "loser" and told me that it didn't matter because later in the week he was going with Little Dad. Hmmph.) Ultimately, when he finally calmed down he felt the need to tell me that I was being a bit harsh.
Here is my philosophy. He lives in my house, by my rules. It is not a discussion. I explained this to him. I asked him how many times he had heard me remind him about the rules in the past. He wanted to come out of his room and I told him that I wasn't ready yet. He sat in his doorway and said that he understood why he was in trouble and was able to articulate every misstep and faulty choice. It is the first time that he has been able to do that. He then stated that the problem is that he needs to practice making better decisions in dealing with his anger and frustration. We discussed what some of those options were.
Result? Punishment stands. I got a hug and he told me he loved me. I tackled him. Hugged him, told him that I loved him and made him a promise that I would relive this with him when he had his kids.
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